President Barack Obama reversed Wednesday the longstanding US policy of not sending out condolence letters to the families of American troops who commit suicide while deployed in combat zones.
Families who’s loved ones commit suicide after returning home will still not receive a condolence letter. According to the Tragedy Assistance Program for Survivors, 2/3rds of military suicides happen when service members return home.
Kevin Lucey, whose son Jeffrey Lucey took his own life after returning from Iraq with PTSD, was interviewed on Democracy Now and wrote an editorial entitled “Troop suicides deserves nation’s condolences” calling on President Obama to acknowledge all the casualties of the wars, not just those that happen in combat zones.
I never even thought of this issue before. Thanks for bringing it to attention. So sad.
Not long after Jeff died, I too wrote a similar letter to President Bush requesting that a letter be sent to my parents for the loss of their only son. A few weeks later, I received a letter back from Washington, however, it was only to inform me that condolence letters from the President were reserved for soldiers who’s death was a direct result of combat. Jeff died by suicide while on his second deployment to Iraq.
I was angered by the notion that if his death did not occur while guns were blazing, that it did not constitute for such “honorary” acknowledgements from an elected official.
And we are supposed to believe that they are NOT treated differently? American’s need to come out of the dark ages and REALIZE that with the amount of troops that have been deployed to both wars for over 10 years now, the idea that these men and women do not deserve more respect for their service is appalling and a call for change is way past due!!
Do you believe that families of fallen soldiers who’s deaths are by suicide are unworthy of a simple letter? For those of us who have lost our loved ones this way, let me give you some insight…I’d much rather have had him die any other way than the way that he did. At least if it was and IED or mortar round, or small arms fire, I’d be able to look at his death and have understanding. However, not one day goes by that our family doesn’t question “Did I not do enough? Did I say the wrong thing to him? What was the last thing I said to him?” It’s a death that has no clear reason, only speculation.
As if that loss isn’t bad enough, you somehow find yourself carrying the burden of guilt, as if it were somehow YOUR fault!
Shame on these presidents…neither one of them know what hard work really is, nor do they respect the fact that despite how they died, these brave men and women stepped forward to take on a task that no one else dare take on.
In 2006, I spoke out on PTSD, suicide, and the failures of the military for our troops seeking help. Lisa Chedekel, former investigative reporter for Hartford Courant wrote a series on this issue. What initially began as a probe into “Question 7″, (asking returning troops about possible mental issues resulting from war), it turned into something bigger than what she or I ever imagined. “Mentally Unfit, Forced To Fight” followed by “Jeff was really messed up”, prompted senators to reevaluate the assessment of combat veterans returning home.
After hearing of how Jeff was denied, denied, denied any help for his PTSD and the pitfalls within the military that he fell through, (with superiors all knowing), people were outraged and demanded change to protect those, like my brother.
It was not easy to speak out about something that is still today looked down upon by many, but I did because I wanted to give my baby brother the voice that they denied him having for himself. And I believed that even if by sharing our story that only one service member was saved, it would be worth it…for his/her family.
So for a family that has sacrificed so much for the better of all men and women who serve to be denied a fancy piece of paper with a few words of sympathy for our fallen soldier, ended with a stamped on signature is TOO much to ask of our President, then that’s pitiful.
My brother was Spc. Jeffrey Henthorn February 8, 2005.
If you would like to read the series by Lisa Chedekel (which is moving and informative) query “mentally unfit forced to fight” and then query “Jeff was really messed up”
The boy in the photo is my nephew, Chance who was 7 at the time Jeff died. Trisha, his ex is standing behind him. Jeff left behind our dad Warren, mom Kay, sister Jayme, other sister (me)Shannon, and three beautiful boys, Chance, Brenden, and Joshua.
Shannon,
Thanks so much for sharing your story. I found the article about your brother you mentioned – http://dartcenter.org/content/mentally-unfit-forced-to-fight
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Samantha
Program Director, MFSO